I need help removing her.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
