We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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