I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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