i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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