i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
