it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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