Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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