So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
