you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
