You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize