i'm signing you up for texting rehab
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Randomize