On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
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