yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
