all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Pants are for mortals
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
