I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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