What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I am one with the molecules
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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