I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
