What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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