he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
