Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize