She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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