i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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