i don't plan on having that self control this summer
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Holy shit dude........stairs
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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