shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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