smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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