Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
