You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
