I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
