fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
