The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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