I heard we made out
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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