well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
