Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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