so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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