It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
