Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
