Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize