cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
We left the knife in your bed.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
