Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
