I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
