Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
