fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
