if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
