If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize