did you get engaged???
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
