He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
