I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
50% drunk capacity currently
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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