remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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