yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
