it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
